Self Awareness

This morning I was reading in Acts 5 (yeah, I woke up in the night a week or so ago and knew this is what I needed to read next since we just finished the Bible in a Year plan... it is rather humbling that He prompts my heart better out of a dead sleep at 3 in the morning than in the middle of the day when I am awake... but thats for another blog, another day!!)

At the beginning of Acts 5 (http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=acts%205&version=47) we learn about Ananias and Sapphira, their choice to give in to their pride.. sin against God and ultimately die because of their choices. Their pride opens doors to other sins... and they become more consumed about their reputations than their character.

As you know, John has quite a collection of a library and I have started reading through his commentaries as a supplement to the Word. I came across a really profound thought that parallels 1 Corinthians 11:31... the author states that if Ananias and Sapphira were at a place to judge their own sin, God would not of judged them and killed them. This got me thinking about the importance of living at a place where any discrepancy in our flesh is immediately brought to our attention as it conflicts with what the Word of God commands.... that we can deal with it rightly, repent quickly, and seek true forgiveness from God through the blood, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ and put that sin to death.

The world tell us that self awareness is knowing our wants, our desires.. it is a society based around "me" mentality!! But biblical self awareness is being in the Word and a personal relationship with Him, knowing the flesh, recognizing the sin... the grace that is ours through Jesus Christ and that there is freedom in losing myself in Him!!

What a critical role the church plays in all of this... what vitality there is in fellowship and true accountability.... what a blessing it is to serve along side of women and their families who commit to living transparently before one another to seek death in the things that dishonor and displease God!! To discuss the hard topics, to admit that they are not perfect, who are not afraid to speak of their weakness and flaws.. and who above all else, love the Lord wholeheartedly and seek to glorify Him with their all!!

I realized today in conversation with a sweet friend that I am utterly blessed beyond what my mind can even comprehend... that since we have moved to North Carolina, God has been so faithful to constantly place these women in my life who pursue Him, me and godly characters! There have been women who set the foreground for this from the time that we came here, women who have come across our path in the previous years and walk along side me right now on a regular basis that are these people for me... they are my Nathans... they hold me up and ask me the hard ?s and I hope I am the same for them!!

I pray that the Lord continues to show us the importance of living tenderly and vulnerably before Him, keep us uncomfortable, remind us of the imperative role of His church and accountability in our lives and in the lives of the ones we love... and I pray that the purpose of the church in His Word propels all of our hearts from the place we are now... to bestow these truths on the women we come to love and live along side of for the rest of our lives!!

It is a privilege to be a domino... Im not worthy and not the best... but I pray I land on someone the way some of you have landed on and moved me because you are a willing vessel....


I AM SO BLESSED!!!!!!!